R

I know the memories here scare you and because you've gone through so much that you want to get away. But I don't want you to. I know you feel left out when you're with them, I know you think that the whole world does not want you and that you're all alone but I hope you know I'll be there for you. I don't want you to feel like I'm treating you as a replacement because of her but I want you to know I really care and love you. These 2 weeks have been my most enjoyable days with you and I am not going to hide the fact. Even if we aren't the best of friends and even if we bicker now and then, you've did more than what a best friend would do. I always thought that friends are easy to come easy to go and even if I complain about not having true friends I always thought that I would never be alone. Just today I realised how much it hurts when you told me you were going to leave. I learnt to cherish the people around me from that second you told me that news. You won't know how much it hurts because you can only think of how your childhood would be so much better when you leave. You can only think of getting to know more people and having better friends than what you have now. You can only think of enjoying everyday when you step into that school. Yet I can only think of how things will be so much better if you could stay. But the test is tomorrow. What if you pass? You would have to leave. So what if you would only know the results in sept? Time passes so fast nowadays and in a blink of an eye it would have already been september. Just a week ago I still thought of how nice if we could be in the same class next year but now... I'm crying behind this screen unbelievable huh? I'm crying so hard you would be so surprised. No matter what I say or do you've already made up your mind and I have nothing to say. I wish you the best when you're over there and I hope you will find many new best friends who will never make you feel like you're an extra. I'm sorry I couldn't be a better friend.

Xoxo,
Rachel